
Ever since the first fanboys gathered around the fire to share tales of far off galaxies and fair maidens, there were those that would debate the merit of those tales when compared to others. (Me, I imagine two cavemen coming to blows over which Mammoth hunter would be better suited to save the tribe from a saber tooth tiger… Picargh or Kurk?) As our genre has grown these debates have become more and more complicated, with more characters vying for supremacy in an ever increasing metaverse of fandom. Want to start a bar brawl (or slave Leia pillow fight, pictured above) at the next con you go to? Here’s my picks for 8 timeless fanboy debates that are sure to get the blood pumping (in no particular order):
Kirk vs Picard

This is of course, the great granddaddy of all fan debates. A classic tale of the renegade vs. the straight arrow. It’s so compelling because there are so many layers to consider… Who is the better officer? Does knowing when to throw out the rulebook give you an advantage? Who is most likely to save the universe if seducing a beautiful woman is required? The topic is forbidden on game night at my house for a reason.
Superman vs. the Incredible Hulk

This argument has been around for much longer than Kirk vs. Picard, because it is a classic case of irresistible force vs. immovable object. Hulk gets stronger the angrier he gets, and Kryptonians can survive a direct hit from an asteroid. While this has been done a few times in the comics, I think that the best resolution to this fight ended with Superman just bracing himself, and letting Hulk hit him until he calmed down and changed back into Banner. Now that’s class.
Han Solo vs Mal Reynolds

This is a great debate primarily because Han and Mal are almost direct reflections of one another. I think in many ways the story of Mal Reynolds is how Han would have wound up had the rebellion lost the civil war. One can imagine Han having to eke out a living in the outer rim after the war just trying to keep the Falcon flying, and getting into brawls with off duty stormtroopers he catches making dirty jokes about princess Leia. Serenity vs the Falcon is no contest… The Millennium Falcon is in all ways the superior ship…(ahem… weapons?) but if Han and Mal found each themselves facing each other alone on the dust of some backward world, who’s coming off that rock alive?
Death Star vs Borg cube

The edge might seem obviously to lean toward the Death Star in terms of sheer firepower, but the Borg have it all over the empire in terms of tenacity. Data says at one point (blanking on the episode) that it would take destroying 70% of a Borg cube to just disable it. The Death Star’s primary weapon works great on planets and Mon Calamari cruisers, but Cubes are far less dense than either. Would it even work on the Borg cube before the Borg analyzed All it would take would be one boarding party, and the Empire would find itself up to its armpits in Borg in no time. Again this is one with many layers… Would the Borg be able to adapt to imperial technology fast enough? If Darth Vader is aboard the Death Star, does it make a difference?
Wolverine vs. the Predator

I’m sure anyone would agree that Wolverine’s skull and spine would make a pretty impressive adornment to any Predator’s trophy room. But what chance does a Predator have of actually making the kill? Wolverine’s enhanced sense of smell might very well be the deciding factor here, as it could negate the advantage of the Predator cloaking technology.
Star Destroyer vs. The Enterprise (1701-d) vs. Galactica

"Commander Riker, bring me my brown pants."
This one might seem like a no-brainer at first glance, but can make for some interesting late night gaming discussions. Although the Enterprise has technologically superior weaponry, Both the Star Destroyer and Galactica are capable of launching several squadrons of fighter craft, giving the Enterprise multiple targets to contend with while they blast away at their shields. Galactica is certainly able to take more of a pounding from the Enterprise than the Star Destroyer is, and the twelve colonies undoubtedly train their officers better than the Empire.
Data vs. R2D2
When I first heard about this one it seemed kind of silly, until the friend that suggested it qualified the matchup with “Who would be more likely to be Time magazine’s man of the year?” At first glance Data seems the more likely of the two, but when you consider that Artoo was partially responsible for at least three major republic victories and was wounded in combat during the battle of Yavin, it becomes far less clear cut. Another point was that as sidekicks, who would you rather have as your wingman in a bar… Mr. “Fully Functional” or Mr. “look at how cute he beeps?”
Batman vs. Captain America

Although the JLA/Avengers crossover event a few years ago promised to answer this one, it never really did. Batman says at one point that it’s conceivable that Cap would beat him, but it would take a long time. Other crossovers have given us still more cop-outs with no clear cut winner. Personally, I think this one would come down to ethics… Batman isn’t afraid to fight dirty if he has to, and that gives him the edge.
I undoubtedly have left out a few good ones… What’s your favorite fanboy debate?














August 2, 2010
#1
Really, Wolverine vs. Predator and not Aliens vs. Predator? Or has that one been solved to everyone’s satisfaction?
August 4, 2010
#2
@steve- I actually tried to avoid the Aliens as. Predator argument here as it has been the subject of a motion picture or two… It seems that the predator species has managed to all but “tame” the Alien for it’s ritual hunts, unless those dang humans screw things up by taking Pred weapons…
August 2, 2010
#3
Boba Fett vs. Samus!! I would kill to have an answer!
August 17, 2010
#4
Samus would kick the ass of bobba fett , the technology on samus suit would just dismember, freeze, and blast away fett. nuff said
August 2, 2010
#5
In the Solo vs. Reynolds question, I guess you have to determine whether you’re dealing with the original Corellian or the creamy nougat-centered one from the Special Edition who didn’t shoot first …
August 18, 2010
#6
original, definitely. han shot first.
August 3, 2010
#7
On Data vrs. R2D2, on the bar part of the question…it depends on what you’re looking for. If you’re in a fight, I want Data to have my back, if you’re looking to pick up checks well…nothing like a cute beeping android to get attention. LOL
August 4, 2010
#8
I would suggest that you not be so quick to discount R2 in a bar fight.. he’s been known to be quite liberal with that taser of his, plus he always seems to have a weapon hidden inside him when you need it.
August 15, 2010
#9
what the hell, galactica has no shields. star destroyers have shields and armour. how is it able to take more of a pounding?
not that i wouldn’t love to see Hot Dog take down the Executor instead of that nameless A-wing dude.
August 17, 2010
#10
Okay, the destroyer’s turbolasers might slowly vaporize through Galactica’s massive armor, but Galactica has ginormous main-battery guns, and a load of nukes if that isn’t enough. I think Galactica’s AA batteries could chew up any TIEs that got too close, and her flight squadron could take any of the more numerous but poorly-piloted Imperial fighters that got through.
August 16, 2010
#11
Goku vs Superman is also a good one and a debate i often have. Sonic Vs Mario also.
August 16, 2010
#12
batman vs spiderman
October 20, 2010
#13
lol I thought these were supposed to be fairly even matchups?
Batman would destroy Spider-man. Like a rock through tissue paper. It’s not even worth wasting your time on.
November 5, 2010
#14
lolwut?
August 16, 2010
#15
Um hi?! No Batman vs. Superman? But you have Superman vs. The Hulk and Batman vs. Captain America. Nobody ever talks about those.
Fail
August 17, 2010
#16
But we’ve SEEN Batman vs Superman in the DC comics.
We already know who ultimately pwns.
Black Adam vs Anyone. LOL.
August 17, 2010
#17
lol youre a huge noob. batman always beats superman. batman always carries kryptonite in his utility belt at ALL times. superman wouldnt have a chance.
August 16, 2010
#18
what about superman vs. captain america? this, my friends is the ultimate DC vs. Marvel debate because any number of things could become involved depending on the situation. Not to mention all the superteams they could potentially bring in to back them up. This raises the even larger question, Avengers vs. Justice League? and it goes on and on people!
October 20, 2010
#19
No, Superman would crush captain America. Captain America doesn’t have nearly the strength or speed of Superman… or the heat vision or ice breath or flight…
August 16, 2010
#20
The Wolverine would tear Predator a new one. The Predator stands no chance against Wolverines fast heal and adamantium skeleton. There would be no way for the Predator to destroy Wolverines skeleton.
August 16, 2010
#21
ps3 vs. xbox 360
August 17, 2010
#22
what are you, on crack. the gpu in the xb360 is the cheap version of that in the ps3. not to mention bd capability.
August 17, 2010
#23
xbox 360 kicks the ps3′s over glorified ass. not only is the online gameplay twice as good but the controllers arent hollow pieces of crap. plus xbox has a much better upperhand on the games for xbox vs games for ps3. its like halo 3 vs killzone 2. the answer is obvious.
and yes i do have both a xbox and a ps3
August 18, 2010
#24
your seriously pulling the Halo 3 vs KZ2? halo 3 sucked ASS. the only time H3 is a good game is when your to drunk to know to know your kd. as far as controllers go, if it works why make a new one… how many revisions on the xbox controller have there been?
August 19, 2010
#25
360 all the way. I have both systems and I get everything worth playing on my 360. I hate my 3 and wish i had never bought it.
August 20, 2010
#26
I really with people would just shut the hell up about the ps3 vs 360 thing. They are both great systems, I own both, but a good PC is vastly superior to both systems. That being said, Halo 3 and KZ2 are both good games in their own right. I lean slightly toward halo simply because the controls aren’t crap. The clunky ass controls in KZ2 just about ruined the game for me. I heard they’re fixing that in KZ3 though, so I’m looking forward to that.
October 20, 2010
#27
Yea, the PC is vastly superior… if you like buying new parts every six months. You know, for people who are stupid and have a lot of money they need to throw down the toilet.
August 16, 2010
#28
Samus vs. Boba Fett
August 17, 2010
#29
samus kicks the ass of bobba just poor bobba has NO chance, better opponent would be master chief and there is a video called haloid explaining what would happen.
August 16, 2010
#30
Godzilla vs. Chuthulu
August 17, 2010
#31
god zilla and cthulhu are friends as is mentioned calls to cthulhu
id like to see some old fashioned cat fights
cat woman. v cheetarah
Lois lane v. Mary Jane
and wonder woman v super girl
August 17, 2010
#32
I like those combos =)
August 17, 2010
#33
Captain Reynolds would destroy Solo.
August 17, 2010
#34
Joss Whedon is a hack dude… Lucas can write circles around Whedon.
August 18, 2010
#35
Please. Just because Whedon writes for TV and fox screws up EVERY SINGE ONE of his shows doesn`t mean he is worse then Lucas. In fact Whedon hasn`t done a crappy add on to an already good trilogy (Indiana Jones: Crystal Skull anyone?) so your full of crap and learn about what you are talking about.
August 19, 2010
#36
Lucas hasn’t been able to write for twenty years, unless you consider writing the dignity out of every great franchise he ever created writing in circles.
August 17, 2010
#37
Gambit vs. Legolas?
Bigfoot vs. Chewbacca?
Wolverine vs. Darth Vader?
August 17, 2010
#38
Does Bigfoot really have a history of violence or battle experience of any kind especially against a military trained bandit Wookie? Wolverine and Darth would be interesting, until of course Vader used the force to incapacitate Wolverine and then use the light saber to slice through adamantium like frozen butter (i say frozen because it will give slight resistance).
August 17, 2010
#39
Oh and kinetic powers versus arrows? no question.
August 18, 2010
#40
Don’t you know your Star Wars alternate universe? Bigfoot IS Chewbacca.
August 17, 2010
#41
Bigfoot at least has a massive stealth advantage, and I think Wolverine just has to get close to Darth Vader once to win. Assuming Darth Vader doesn’t know about the healing factor, Wolverine has two golden opportunities to rip his robot guts out. I will say that I think Gambit has a greater chance of landing a hit on Legolas, but Legolas has a greater chance of connecting with a kill shot.
August 17, 2010
#42
Ditka vs. God. Wait, trick question; Ditka IS God.
August 17, 2010
#43
supermans too o.p. its bs like cmon DC u cant be a little creative?
August 18, 2010
#44
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Empire/Essays/FiveMinutes.html
Everything that is Star Wars in terms of technology will demolish the Enterprise D.(Picard’s ship)
The slave 1 (Personal transport/bounty hunter’s ship) Main guns: 64000 GW (2 kilotons per shot, 480 rpm firing rate onscreen in AOTC for time-averaged power output rather than peak output)
Enterprise D: Main phasers: 3.6 GW (5.1 MW per emitter, 200 emitters in the main phaser array, 2 full-sized saucer arrays and 3 smaller roughly half-size arrays on the stardrive section, p.123). Note that phasers appear to have a chain-reaction effect so their raw power output may be deceptively low.
Much less the death star’s insane damage. Planetary destruction: Death Star blast (roughly 20 billion trillion megatons, ie- the number “two” followed by 22 zeroes). Planet blown apart at 5% of the speed of light. Even if we assume the shot was time-lapse photography (not that there’s any reason to), the absolute lower limit is roughly 50 quadrillion megatons. Note that even if you scale this monster down by a factor of 10 million (to the volume of a Star Destroyer), you’d still have 5 billion megatons. More than a match for poor Enterprise.
Now I feel nerdier for posting this. :(
August 18, 2010
#45
Joel vs. Mike
(MST3k)
August 18, 2010
#46
JOEL
September 30, 2010
#47
Are you kidding me? Joel has the voice of a prepubescent teenager. MIKE FTW
August 18, 2010
#48
I am amazed that the classic Raistlin vs. Drizzt did not make this list.
August 18, 2010
#49
Michael Myers vs. Jason Voorhees
or
Chucky vs. The Leprechaun
or
Gremlins vs Critters
August 18, 2010
#50
but that’s not Patrick Stewart? o__O
August 19, 2010
#51
TOS Star fleet Red Shirts vs Imperial Storm Troopers
August 19, 2010
#52
for the batman vs cap they have the pictures of dick grayson as batman and bucky as cap. any fan of the cap comics knows that bucky isnt afraid to fight a little dirty, also as a batman reader dick grayson is a pretty bad batman, he says many times how restrained he is by the cap and how it throws him off balance. i believe the clear cut winner hear is bucky cap.
November 1, 2010
#53
Sorry, but no.
I agree, cap knows how to fight dirty, but batman vs. anybody, and batman wins.
I’d like to see the Pheonix vs. Magneto. Never been done before.
August 19, 2010
#54
i’d like to see Goku vs. Superman
August 21, 2010
#55
COME ON! The Borg cube would assimilate the Death Star in no time.
August 22, 2010
#56
They wouldn’t be able to board because of the varied and extremely powerful shielding of the Death Star. Power-level interference aside, it uses two types of shielding. This alone would make beaming anyone on or off quite impossible.
Also, the Borg phaser arrays don’t hold up against the laser arrays of the Death Star, or possibly even TIE fighters (as poster #40 has mentioned regarding the ship triage and weapon power outputs).
August 21, 2010
#57
5/19/13 EXPECT US
August 22, 2010
#58
Ok, borg would take deathstar, Real Batman would beat the crap outta real Cap. Rastilin would smoke drizzit, Master of time kinda wins that one hands down, I stab you, whoops nope you don’t you missed cause I went back in time. repeat till drizzit dies of heartattack.
Personal one I wanna see is Thor Vs. Aries.
August 22, 2010
#59
This is the greatest geek out moment I have had in a long time. Mainly because of the article but the comments are golden!
August 25, 2010
#60
Darth Vader vs. Lord Voldemort, a fight I yearn for.
September 30, 2010
#61
That would be stellar. I’m not sure I can choose who would win. I’m a fan of both series. Possibly Voldemort.
August 29, 2010
#62
Why would it come down to ethics? You think Captain America doesn’t fight dirty? First of all: The one pictured is Bucky, who debuted by shooting out his enemies’ kneecaps (which is awesome), so let’s assume you screwed up and meant to picture Steve Rogers. But Steve would use any tactical advantage to ensure victory, he definitely isn’t some kind of pussy.
Batman wins if he’s ready because he’s Batman. Steve has superpowers and is a master of combat equal to Batman, he wins in any kind of fair fight, dirty tactics or not.
August 30, 2010
#63
Goku vs. Superman is a classic.
August 31, 2010
#64
How about Gandalf vs. Vader? Both have magic swords of sorts, both have magical powers of sorts…
September 1, 2010
#65
Captain America would win because he isn’t afraid to fight dirty either. He killed people in world war 2. He isn’t afraid to do anything if its necessary to win. For god sake, he took out iron man by putting a device on his hand during a hand shake.
September 6, 2010
#66
No Crysis suit “guy”* vs Master chief?
*i say guy because THEY FUCKING CHANGE THE MAIN CHARACTER IN EVERY GAME!!
September 17, 2010
#67
Sorry, guys, Death Star vs. the Borg has been dealt with unbiasedly by http://www.stardestroyer.net/Empire/Fanfic/Conquest/index.html
It’s some seriously good fanfiction (I usually hate all fanfiction, but this story is DAMN well written). From the same site as Bob in comment #40 above.
September 28, 2010
#68
Magneto vs Darth Vader
September 30, 2010
#69
Batman can beat anyone given a week to plan
October 20, 2010
#70
1 hour of actual planning.
6 days 23 hours of patrol in Gotham city to avoid getting bored.
September 30, 2010
#71
Luke from ROTJ vs. Obi-Wan from ROTS.
My vote goes with Obi-Wan.
October 17, 2010
#72
Ironman vs. Batman?
I’m a fan of Iron man. My friends dad and I have this argument… “Of course batman would win. He’s also a genius.” he would say… But so is Iron Man… and he’s a pimp.
October 20, 2010
#73
Batman would probably win just because Iron Man relies on technology.
Once batman takes out the suit (and you know he would somehow), Tony Stark doesn’t stand a chance…
October 21, 2010
#74
The Sentry vs. Superman
October 21, 2010
#75
Luke from ROTJ vs. Obi-Wan from ROTS? Obi Wan all the way. He beat the young, agile Vader. Luke only beat the old cyborg Vader because he gave into his anger.
And Sentry would destroy Superman. He would target Supermans friends, family etc. He has no soul.
October 26, 2010
#76
I’ve always wanted to see:
Crono vs Serge
Cloud vs Squall
Link vs the main character from Fable
November 20, 2010
#77
lame ass mother fuckers
November 29, 2010
#78
Batman Vs Ironman.
Messed up anti-hero Vs. Smug asshole version of himself.
December 18, 2010
#79
ALIENS versus BORG
BORG versus DALEKS
JEANIE versus SAMANTHA
THE DOCTOR versus THE DEATH STAR
BEETLEJUICE versus PINHEAD
December 28, 2010
#80
Does no one remember the Marvel vs. DC back in like ’95? Hulk vs. Superman, Batman vs. Cap, Robin vs. Jubilee, Wolverine vs. Lobo
December 29, 2010
#81
Batman v DareDevil
Storm v Wonder Woman
Green Lantern v Thor